I learned the hard way there was in fact a limit to how fast I could take that corner on my sled. I swung just a bit wide and hit the cellar bulkhead shoulder blade first. My mother made me put on a suit to go to the emergency room. My first x-ray. Not my last.
That’s where the fear began. Not a fear of physical harm, but a fear of lack of control. I hate the feeling of being just along for the ride. I need to be in charge. That’s why I hate those damn roller-coasters. No control.
I fell in love with her as she shed those exquisite tears eighteen feet of silver screen tall. Years later I learned that her beauty was all makeup and lighting. The tears, glycerin. My love for her was not diminished. Some of us like what we find behind the curtain.
There was power behind the scenes. I wanted that power. I wanted to be the puppet master. The one that made the audience fall in love with the people on the screen, all while maintaining my own anonymity. Till one day some child sees me behind the curtain, and smiles.
